Dear Reader,
I’ve noticed something about my own mind recently.
Circumstances have required me to deal with a few things that I should have dealt with a while ago. It’s been uncomfortable, but also illuminating, because as I’ve faced them I’ve seen very clearly what was slowing me down: catastrophic thinking.
As a (sometimes naive) optimist, this surprised me! But it's undeniably true.
One example: a leaky roof became "My house is ruined"
Nothing actually happened - in fact we got it sorted, and just in time - but my nervous system behaved as if it already had.
Now, I know what's going on - my clients tell me about it all the time! I've been catastrophising. Yes, even optimism-biased, positive-oriented, solution-focused hypnotherapists can immobilise themselves with awful thinking.
Only last night I told people I would feel good if "my house is still standing in the morning". What am I doing to myself?!
Of course some of it masquerades under the guise of real risk, and compassion for others facing them. But if we don't keep this in check, it quietly robs us of proportion, perspective - and action. All the more so the sensitive and empathetic amongst us.
Imagining disaster is something our brains are brilliantly designed to do. They have evolved to scan for danger and, if in doubt, to panic, not keep things in proportion. "Better safe than sorry", they say. And when the threat system switches on, the imagination doesn’t just whisper… it SHOUTS.
And here’s the strange twist:
When the mind is busy catastrophising, we often do… nothing.
We freeze.
We delay.
We avoid.
Not because we don’t care - but because the problem has become so huge in our heads that it feels impossible to touch.
Ironically, while we’re waiting - hoping the feeling will pass - the real-world situation can actually get worse.
Small things become big things.
Loose ends fray further.
Opportunities close.
Roof cavities rot.
Not because the problem was truly catastrophic… but because the nervous system thought it was.
What I’ve learned, personally, is this:
The first job isn’t to solve the problem.
It’s to settle the nervous system.
Settle, then solve. Regulate, then respond.
Only from calm can we see:
- what’s actually happening
- what matters
- and what the next sensible step might be
Much better to calm than catastrophise.
There are lots of very effective, natural ways to interrupt the loop. First awareness. Then choice. And sometimes tactical tools help too. Here’s one:
Place one hand on your chest and one on your belly.
Take a slow breath in… and a longer breath out.
Now quietly ask yourself:
“What’s the smallest, most proportionate next step here?”
Not the perfect solution.
Not the five-year plan.
Just the next gentle action.
That question only works when the body feels a little safer.
And small actions can feel surprisingly good. Satisfying. And this leads to more. This is how big things are achieved. Regulate, then resolve. Begin, then build. Steady, ready, go. Pause before you pounce!
This is at the heart of what I do. It really works. It astounds me every day! And it’s why this year I’m organising my work so that more of it is easier to access.
It’s becoming:
The Wave Library - calm, practical resources for self-study
The Wave Club - groups, events and talks, and
Rising C Levels - my full-fat personal growth programme for powerful people
All of it is designed to help you step out of emergency mode, so that Clarity, Calm and Confidence can return and take centre stage, at work and at home.
Life doesn’t ask us to be fearless. It just asks us to come back into the present, where most things are far more workable than our imaginations might otherwise suggest.
Best wishes,
Adam
PS And just to say - my thoughts are with everyone who is facing something difficult or uncertain right now.
